The last week I have felt forsaken and forgotten. It has felt like God is no longer watching over me. I’m struggling financially, and in my need of provision, it seems God isn’t providing, and he’s forgotten about me.
The other day I was walking through a clothes shop with my friends, and they were buying all these nice expensive clothes, and if I’m honest, I was nearly brought to tears. I wasn’t upset, annoyed, or jealous of them for having more money, they deserve it, and I’m happy for them. I was upset because as they were buying all these things, my credit account was sitting at -£100, and I had no idea how I would pay that off by the 15th.
As we’re walking through this store, they’re buying all these clothes. I’m standing here with nothing, my friends are like, “Adam, what are you going to get” and I say the usual “there’s nothing here I like” because I’m too ashamed to say I can’t afford it. Standing in this predicament, I’m like, “God, I sacrifice for you. Why am I left with nothing? God, what about me? What about me, God? Where’s my blessing? Where’s my provision? I never have enough to buy nice things, and that’s fine because it’s a sacrifice, but why do the very people who sacrifice for you end up with less? What about me, God? Have you forgotten me? Please don’t forget your servant., Lord.”
Three days later, my credit account still sits at -£100. My anxiety had compounded more, and it was gaining more compound interest as the payment date drew near. It’s Friday night, and I went for a walk. As I’m waking in a forest on a cold winter night feeling forgotten and forsaken, I put some worship on my earphones and cry out to God, “Lord help me!” And as I was walking, my soul felt struck by lightning, and I heard the words, “watch me provide.” I also see a vision. I see my bank account in this vision. Around it was arrows from all directions pointing to my bank account. I believe God was showing me I would see provision from many angles, and it would all be because of him. I sit down in the woods, and I begin to cry. I wasn’t crying about the money. In fact, it was never about the money. I cried because I realized God’s still got me. He hasn’t forsaken me or forgotten me. He didn’t abandon his servant, and he never will. He heard me in that store when my weary soul cried out: “what about me, God? What about me?” As I got up from the forest floor, I opened my phone and saw that someone had blessed me with £300, and my debt was cleared.
Isaiah 49:14-16 – “But Zion said, “The Lord has forsaken me; my Lord has forgotten me.” “Can a woman forget her nursing child, that she should have no compassion on the son of her womb? Even these may forget, yet I will not forget you. Behold, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands; your walls are continually before me.”
Look up to the heavens! Look what the lord has done; look at his abundance, every planet, every star, black hole, and galaxy! He created it all with a word. His wisdom surpasses any man’s; non can come close to him. He sent his son to die for his enemies, the very ones who sinned against him. He sits on his throne in heaven, surrounded by angels, and is worshipped day and night! He looks over all that he has created, he sees the sparrow fall, he didn’t forget or forsake Zion, and won’t forget or forsake you.
Genesis 8:1 – “But God remembered Noah and all the wild animals and livestock with him in the boat. He blew a wind across the earth, and the waters began to go.”
At the right time, God will blow over all your troubles, and they will begin to go. You are unforsaken and unforgotten. God’s still got you – Adam.